Globe-trotting swingers share where they feel most liberated

They’re putting the “lust” in wanderlust.

Traveling swingers Cate and Darrell Wander have jetted to 20 countries since opening up their relationship a decade ago — stamping their passports in the pursuit of pleasure.

Cate, 37, and Darrell, 47, met in Sydney in 2007 and started dating as a monogamous couple.

But five years into the relationship, the pair decided to open their relationship and become “ethically non-monogamous” — meaning that they communicate before having sex with others outside their marriage.

“My favorite thing about swinging is meeting new people from all walks of life,” Cate told South West News Service Wednesday. “We tend to be more open and less surface level, everyone is nude and disarmed without any judgments.”

The kinky couple quickly became hooked on the alternative lifestyle and soon decided to swing abroad. The twosome have romped in Singapore, Thailand, Malaysia, Mexico, Japan, France and the UK.

They also jet to the US regularly to host swinging events in hotels — but the pair say the Netherlands is the most open-minded and welcoming place they’ve been.

Cate and Darrell even relocated from Australia to Amsterdam in March because they love the “openness and fluidity of Dutch culture.”

“In the Netherlands people don’t bat an eyelid, everyone is very open here,” Cate said. “Sexuality and nudity isn’t a big deal.”

The sex-positive blond stated that swinging is “viewed differently depending on where you are in the world.” For instance, Cate said the French are far more liberated than many other countries. In the south of that country there is a “naked city” called Cap D’agde where 40,000 nudists live.

That stands in contrast to Malaysia and Thailand, where swinging is illegal and operates underground.

Meanwhile, Cate confessed that she didn’t exactly swing in to swinging — saying that opening up her relationship wasn’t initially easy.

“The first time I swung I was terrified,” she stated, saying she had to initially overcome feelings of shame while being sexual with others in front of her husband.

“There is a really negative stigma surrounding the lifestyle,” the amorous Aussie explained. “I thought a hairy chested dude wearing a gold chain with a beer belly was going to come out and f – – k me. It was nothing like that at all. There are people from all walks of life.”

Now, the couple enjoy all sorts of erotic activities with other people.

The couple’s favorite sexual activities are “puppy piles” — a large pile of people of mixed sexes, cuddling and or heavy petting each other, often without clothes on.

The pair also define themselves as a “hot-wife” couple — meaning Darrell enjoys watching Cate receive pleasure from other men. He also sets up dates for her to go on with other guys.

Meanwhile, Cate discovered she was bisexual after a few years of swinging as the lifestyle liberated her to explore her sexuality.

“I find with other women I can be honest and deep instead of competitive and catty as we are not sizing each other up to see where each of us sit in the hierarchy,” she said. “It really is a beautiful thing.”

Darrell said his relationship with Cate has only become stronger since they decided to become swingers, saying they openly communicate about their desires.

“When we first swung I was scared and excited, but the feeling of excitement overruled,” he recalled. “We have guidelines, for example, we won’t take one for the team. If one of us isn’t interested we both aren’t interested. We come first and each have the veto power to leave a situation or a couple if one of us doesn’t wish to continue.”

Cate quit her high-flying corporate career as a global director of operations in 2019 due to “a morality clause in her work contract.”

She said swingers get a bad rap in many cultures and are seen as being worse than cheaters.

“More often than not, people on normal dating apps and those who cheat on their partners non-consensually will have more sex than those who are part of the swinging lifestyle, yet they are not stigmatized in the same way,” Cate complained.

She added that employees who are found to be swingers are often fired from their jobs due to morality clauses in their contracts. She said that for many schoolteachers in the US an individual’s swinging status could be used as a “weapon against them.”

Despite “liberating herself” after quitting her job and coming out publicly as a swinger, Cate told Southwest News Service that the lifestyle isn’t for everyone.

“There isn’t a one-piece puzzle,” she said. “For some non-monogamy is great, for others monogamy is the answer.”

But she and Darrell have no plans to put away their passports — or their private parts — and will continue their globetrotting bed-hopping swinging.

“We’ve made a global group of friends through swinging,” Darrell said. “Ranging from people who sweep floors for a living to big corporate bosses.”